Hello my name is "Speights"
Thats right im a Southlander and i even have a red and black leash.
Approximatley three months ago I was dropped of to Dogwatch by a person that did not want me anymore, Pam took me in, gave me a bed, food and a nice blanket, what a lady salt of the earth type. Her and her husband gave me love and put my photo on Trademe to see if they could find me a new home.
Well within days this bald cop from "Dorkland" gave my new mum a call and said that he and his misses also a cop from "Dorkland" could offer me the best home that a handsome, sophisticated Southern K9 like myself could ever wish for including a beautiful new girlfriend golden lab called Bonnie.
Mum grilled him like he was on the end of an intence police interview and questioned him to ensure his credentials stacked up, as any protective foster mum would, my potential parents promised walks on the farm, trips in the ute and flat whites on Ponsonby Road at a cost of $7 (Barks) each. I thought to myself do i really want to live in "Dorkland" i mean its poluted and smelly and they dont even know how to play a decent game of rugby.
Well Mum organised the keystone cops to fly down to see if we would all be suited to one anouther, to get straight to the point these buggars are bloody fantastic, they arrived in a flash rented 4x4 from Avis to ensure a Southern K9 like myself had plenty of room (god help the guy who had to vaccum it when the returned it) and plenty of new toys,they took me out to lunch at a friends farm then they flew me up to "Dorkland" no expence spared.
When we arrived at "Dorkland" Airport they even insisted that I travel in the Airport shuttle back to the carpark in my own seat, thats right these people no how to treat a Southern K9.
We all arrived home and it is awesome i get walked every day and we go to my new uncles farm down the road where me and Bonnie run and swim and eat an endless supply of cow poo, and yes Bonnie and I are in love, don't laugh it is the real deal, she shares her toys, keeps me warm at night and in return i protect her and keep her company all day.
As mum and dad work shifts there is always someone at home all the time and when they go out they always take me and Bonnie with them, mum has even brought a new ute to ensure that Bonnie and i have enough room to sleep in our bean bags when we go traveling.
The best news of all is that mum and dad have brought land in South Canterbury and we will be all moving back home in the next twelve months as mum and dad realise that this is where a Southern K9 is meant to be.
Thankyou Pam and all the good folk at Dogwatch for finding me a great new home, you will all be invited to the wedding when Bonnie and I tie the knot.
Kind Regards
Speights
"Good On Ya mate"
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